Hiatus

I haven't posted a real musing about life in a really long time. The reason behind that is a total lack of time. These last two months have been some of the busiest I've had. I've been pulling 60 hour weeks at work (and luckily being paid for some hefty overtime) and that accounts for most of it. So here are updates:

I'M GOING HERE IN 27 HOURS!

I will there for two weeks and I am so excited I'm having a hard time falling asleep at night. Go Italy!

Christmas. Was wonderful. We got to talk to Kathy on the phone and she is doing great in the You-crane. She loves Russian. I think it sounds hilarious.

Go Shissa Kath.

I got the Willow Tree nativity I've been coveting for many a year from my awesome sister-in-law and brother and parents. Go Christmas.

I am now 25. Woah. That happened two days ago. We partied at the cabin. Loved it. I got tickets to go see Lion King in September
and tickets to go see Brian Regan in March Go birthday.

Did I ever mention that I got a new car? I was driving to Salt Lake when this guy swerved into my lane and clipped my car, causing me to smash into the median. Thankfully, I walked away with only a small bruise and stiff shoulders but also with a totaled car. The lame part is that he drove away. But we found this little beauty on KSL.com and ended up paying only $300 for her after collecting insurance money. Her name is Sue. Go Sue.

It has been so fun watching this little guy celebrate his first Christmas. And also I love my sister-in-law Taryn.
Go them.

One of my Christmas presents was a private archery lesson. Larry taught me how to shoot bows and arrows just like Robin Hood (I've had this obsession with Robin Hood since I was little) and I felt so official. I have excellent form.
It is actually waaaay harder than it looks. Go Robin Hood.

I got hired on full time at the MTC working as a training coordinator, meaning my job is to teacher MTC teachers how to be good teachers and I love it. I've been working as a training coordinator for a few months but only part time so I am excited to be there full time, especially since I have benefits and a administrative parking pass at BYU and free tuition and 5 years of job security and I still don't even have my degree. Kathy took this picture of me at work when she was at the MTC and waiting for me to be done so we could go to lunch... she had been waiting for a while... a long while...
Go MTC.

aaaaaaaaaand...

I updated my blog.

Go updates.

Grrrrr.

Bahhhhhhh! It is almost 10:00 PM and I am still at work... and still have another hour or so left of work to do before the night is done. BAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.But somehow, this makes me feel a lot better.

Take Anything You Want- Japanese learning english

Okay, so here is the story behind this one. Remember how I told you all the Japan is the coolest country in the world? Well they decided to try to develop an English language learning program around exercise and chanting to try to help their clients remember the words. They have several scenarios that they teach phrases for. This is one about going to America, getting robbed, and not knowing what to say.

My favorite moments:

• how one of the robbers has the bandanna tied underneath his nose... huh?
• the awkward close-ups they do between chanting of someone's shoulder
• the running in place move these girls have perfected
• the big grin on all of their faces while they chant "spare me my life"
• the way they pronounce "I was robbed by two men"
• the awesome synthesizer music in the background
• the amazing exercise moves, especially during "take anything you want"- the girl on the far left has weird arms
• their amazing exercise outfits with nylons

Seriously, this is the best thing everrrrrrr. We watched it about 23 times last night.

Oh.

My.

GOSH.

A poem.

A poem I wrote recently about an experience I had watching a little girl in the Duomo in Florence on a freezing cold rainy day. Your critique is welcome.

The Florence Duomo

A chilled cathedral, dark and dank

In sullen silence stands of stone

Torrential rain beats at the planks

And I, within, observe alone.

The tired shoulders, bended backs

And hopeless handclasps enter through

With burdened souls in torment racked

In ways that words cannot construe.

Confusion seeps in seeking light

But answers go unquestioned here

The many wond’ring “Where is right?”

Are shushed by reason: cold, austere.

Now past me faceless faces go

Expressions hungry for relief

It’s hard to let a feeling show

As imperceptible as grief

Then suddenly I see her face

All curious and rosy round

She squirms, escaping dad’s embrace

And plants two feet upon the ground

And all at once she’s running fast

Unsteady but with all her might

Determination unsurpassed

Towards a faint and flick’ring light

Tea candles lit by those in need

Are on a stand and placed in rows

She races towards them at full speed

And reaches them, her smile aglow.

Though oft in shadow we reside

Our childlike natures recognize

That in the warmth and light abide

A permanent celestial prize.

And in that moment I could see

Discomfort stemming from the dark

These people longing to be free

Require someone to start a spark.

Canadian Border Patrol

I know I've been posting a lot of videos but when you're working roughly 55 hours a week and trying to fulfill a calling and trying to still have time to eat food and work out and still remaining in contact with family and people and trying to cultivate other relationships, all I have the energy to do anymore is watch videos and listen to podcats on my breaks. This American Life is my favorite new (and free) podcast and this is my favorite new (and free) video.

I promise to blog about real stuff again soon. But in the meantime, you can learn about Robert Michael Jack, who is surprisingly a Border Control Agent for the United States and Canada Border from Washington State to Maine... state.

Why Japan Should Take Over The World.

This has been an extremely long week so I was thrilled that the weekend finally arrived. To celebrate, we watched all of these... and cried. SO FUNNY. (Note: the finding of the following videos is credited to Kenneth D. Bills. May he forever be blessed.)

We're moving to Japan. Who is with us?

I can't breathe...

I can't breathe, I can't breathe... laughing... too much...

New Favorite Song

Learning it on the guitar. Roommate learning the piano. We're looking for a cellist. I love music.

Miss her.

Things I want to do with her but can't because the Ukraine is far away:

• talk to her about stuff
  
• laugh
• joke
• lunch
• dance
• make fun of her wardrobe
• tell stories
• tell her stuff
• lip syncs
  
• learn weird Russian words
• go for drives

I miss my sister.

"melancholy of relationships past"

There is a general place in our brain, I think, reserved for the ‘melancholy of relationships past.’ It grows and prospers as life progresses, forcing you finally, against your better judgment, to listen to country music.

-Kary Mullis, Nobel Prize prize winner 1993

(Note: The individual picture above is NOT Kary Mullis, but wouldn't it be cool if it was?)

Oh yes I did...

I added a Christmas countdown. Before Halloween. And I have had Christmas music playing since August. And I am excited for Christmas. And I'm shamelessly broadcasting it.

Also, if you add one day to the Christmas countdown, you'll have my countdown to when I go back to Italy. Can! Not! Wait!

Refreshing

A friend told me about this and I thought it was really nice. The author also writes for the New York Times. Also, one of the guys I work with (Harris Clarke) is a convert to the church and is currently the only member of his family (although he Grandpa is meeting with the missionaries!!) and his mom wrote this article in the Washintonian about her perspective from the outside of Mormon culture. In a world where so many are so convinced that unless you're disagreeing with someone or something you're not being a good American, I am refreshed to see someone so open minded.

A truly pathetic creature...

Since when did I go from being a self-sufficient and independent young woman, characterized by confidence and optimism, to this?

A pathetic creature whose happiness is dependent on a tiny little box made of plastic and metal. A pitiful creature who jumps at the slightest sound or vibration, who spasms at the faintest flicker of a light, who checks constantly if the little box is working, turned on, or mad at her. A poor creature who can't seem to focus on studying, or anything for the matter, because her eyes keep sneaking over to where she's placed the little box to see if it has changed at all in the last minute-and-a-half. A miserable creature who finally decides to put the tiny box away in her bag but gives in after a mere 54 seconds and pulls the little box out again with a stifled sob. A heartbreaking creature who despises anyone around her who has a little box that calls out to it's owner because it makes her mistake the call for her own little box. A little creature who goes from hating and cursing the birthparents of such a box to loving it and kissing it in only a matter of seconds.

Poor little enigma-afflicted dear. Relax. Chill out. Listen to the voice of reason. You're fine. I'm fine. We're all fine.

Maggie Carpenter: [while frantically fighting with her veil] Who MAKES these things?!

Peggy: Calm down. The veil is not attacking you.

This is how I feel today...

Like a mixture of this:And this:
:)

This is how I felt this morning...

When they arose early in the morning, behold, they were all dead corpses.

Isaiah 37:36

I learned how to do stuff this summer.

Like wake surfing.



And wakeboarding.

And I learned how to fall down a lot.

And I learned that boating is a new favorite.

Hahahaa

Taking matters into my own hands.

I have one class left before I finish my college degree and it is a statistics class. And I don't like it. It's a lot easier than I though (I was all geared up for certain death but it isn't that bad) so sometimes I get bored. So, this is what I learned today in my stats class, although my professor didn't mention any of these things. Huzzah for the internet and a laptop.

• The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (Two questions: What are they drinking and who on earth decided to test this?)

• Almonds are members of the peach family. (Peeled peaches.)
  

• A fierce gust of wind blew 45-year-old Vittorio Luise's car into a river near Naples, Italy, in 1983. He managed to break a window, climb out and swim to shore -- where a tree blew over and killed him. (A true Italian tragedy.)
  

• In 1992, Frank Perkins of Los Angeles made an attempt on the world flagpole-sitting record. Suffering from the flu he came down eight hours short of the 400 day record, his sponsor had gone bust, his girlfriend had left him, and his phone and electricity had been cut off. (Four hundred days? On a flagpole? I'd dump him too.)
  

• There is a hill in New Zealand called "Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu", which translates roughly as The summit where Tamatea, the man with the big knees, the climber of mountains, the land-swallower who travelled about, played his nose flute to his loved one". (I'm so mad... I wanted to discover a hill and use this exact name but someone got to it first.)
  

• In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak. (Oh England...)
  

• A Mexican newspaper reports that bored Royal Air Force pilots stationed on the Falkland Islands have devised what they consider a marvelous new game. Noting that the local penguins are fascinated by airplanes, the pilots search out a beach where the birds are gathered and fly slowly along it at the water's edge. Perhaps ten thousand penguins turn their heads in unison watching the planes go by, and when the pilots turn around and fly back, the birds turn their heads in the opposite direction, like spectators at a slow-motion tennis match. Then, the paper reports, "The pilots fly out to sea and directly to the penguin colony and over fly it. Heads go up, up, up, and ten thousand penguins fall over gently onto their backs."(If I was stationed on the Falkland Islands, I'd make up games like this too. You've got to use what you've got. In Italy, we made up games where we'd pretend the nuns were either on my "team" or my companion's depending and what color their wimple was. Whoever had sighted the most team members by the end of the week owed the other one a gelato.)
  

• On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year. ( I should stop chewing on my pens.)
  

• The "dot" over the letter "i" is called a tittle. (The phrase "jot or tittle" from the scriptures all of a sudden makes some sense!)

• Charlie Chaplin once won third prize in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest. (If I were Charlie, I would go and shake hands with the other two politely. Come on, man, they look more like you than you do! That is tough to do.)
  

• By raising your legs slowly and laying on your back, you cannot sink into quicksand. (Duly noted.)
  

• Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously. (Okay... seriously, who discovered this one?)

And now, my all time favorite random and useless fact:

• If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (WOW. Just, w0w.)
  
  

Hope you learned as much as I did today!

Canyoneering and Goblin Valley Goodness

Went and did this over Labor Day.Saw this juniper.
Walked through this.
Did a little of this.
Played around this, but instead of during the day, it was under a full moon.

Saw this (Molly's Castle) lit up by moonlight. Very cool.
Climbed on this.
Did some more hiking through this.
At the end, I looked a lot like this... minus the bike. Had a great time.

Want to know the best part?

This cost me less than $500. Round trip. First class. I think Delta should change the name of their "buddy" passes to "best friend you'll ever have and you should probably name your first born after" passes. If it feels like I'm rubbing it in, that's because I probably am. It's so stinking rub-in-able that I can't help it. I'm getting so excited to go home!! Well, my real home will always be in Holladay with my family but Italy will always house a large piece of me. Less than four months left!

My Yummiest Post Yet

Today is International Chocolate Day. Dead serious. It's a holiday. I knew that there had to be some kind of holiday like this somewhere. In fact, I guess some genius soul made a holiday out of just about every sweet thing in the world. Look here. So lets take some time and celebrate this celestial substance, shall we?
Whoever does this for a living is cheating. Remember in Ever After when Marguarite describes chocolate as "positively sinful"?
Don't worry though... you're actually burning calories right now as you scroll down looking at these.
Doesn't hurt to look, right?
This one is in Germany. Das es gut, ya?
Oh. My.
Yum.
Yum yum.
Yum yum yum.
Edible art is my favorite kind.


Come on, people! An edible chocolate Yoda? Can life get better? I submit that it cannot.

Oh wait, it can. A chocolate fireplace.
And an entire chocolate room designed by Godiva chocolatiers complete with a chocolate painting by Jackson Pollock. I wonder how long I would last in a chocolate room. I think I'd just go all Augustus Gloopish and eat everything in sight. Reminds me of the Comte de Reynaud falling asleep after eating the window display in Chocolat. I love that part soooo much. But now...
My friends, I'd like to introduce you to the Frrozen Haute Chocolate, otherwise known as the most expensive dessert in the world, retailing at $25,000. Yes, you read that right. How do you get such an expensive dessert? Observe:

• First, you must start by blending 28 different kinds of cocoa, including the 14 most expensive kinds in the world
  
• add 5 grams of edible 23-karat gold
• spoon that into a gold goblet lined with edible gold
  
• put an 18-karat gold bracelet with one carat diamonds in it at the base of said goblet
  
• top with cream and more edible gold
• add a La Madeline au Truffle from Knipschildt Chocolatier (they sell for $2,600 a pound)
• serve with a gold spoon decorate with white and chocolate-colored diamonds

Crazy? Yes. Excessive? Yes. That'd better be one amazingly good sundae. You can find out more here.

Moral of the story? Chocolate is good and we must celebrate it. Reading this too late? Is it no longer International Chocolate Day when you read this? No worries, I'm sure no one will get upset if you choose to celebrate now. Or tomorrow. Or next week. Or every day for the rest of your life.

Mmmmmm.